When we're feeling all alone and blue and totally miserable from our pain, it seems like we can yell from here to the high heavens and nobody is listening. Notice I said "it seems" like nobody is listening. I've been in that place so many times that it's not even funny, and I'm sure that you have, too. Unfortunatly, that's one of the most difficult of all parts of grieving and hurting .... feeling alone.
So, what can we do to ease our loneliness? I have a suggestion that seems almost absurd, but I promise you that it works. While you are NOT in any kind of emotional or physical pain, take the time to make a list of all of the people you "could" call on to help give you support if you needed it. Maybe your Pastor, a family member, a close friend. Perhaps it would be your doctor, a counselor, or the neighbor down the street. You don't need a LONG list; you only need two names to make it a list. Then, put their phone number next to their name.
And, now comes the final action part that will provide you with the support when you need it. CALL THE PERSON(S) on your list and let them know what you are doing. Tell them you are building a support system in ADVANCE so that when the time comes you can call and receive help when you need it in the form of emotional support, a ride to the doctor, an ear to listen, an errand runner. You know what I mean. Almost without hesitation, the person you call will agree to be your special support buddy.
Being prepared is a key factor to receiving support when you need it. When you already know who you will call on, that alone provides healing and comfort. Don't wait until an emergency arrives for you to try to gather your thoughts as to who you can call on to help you. Have your list ready, and I promise you that you will never have to cry out again, "Is anybody listening?" because there always will be somebody there!!!
Clara Hinton
http://www.silentgrief.com/
http://www.clarahinton.com/
